Big boy
He's my brother... comes straight from my mother... he's stronger than he thinks he is. let him know, let him know....
Sigh, i just spoke to my brother and i am so proud of him. he got a good 23+ score for PSLE. when i was in primary6, i only had 209. There was a certain difference to his voice. not only was it deeper, it was much more mature. i actually felt his disappointment (for his results. he expected higher) i felt the teenager in him. the grunting noises he made when he was answering my questions took my breath away.
he was no longer that small boy that tagged along every single game i played. from barbie dolls to catching. I no longer needed to hold his hand and watch out for steps and stuff and bad people for him when we went out. He no longer needs someone to pack his school bag for him (like i always do.) i will still prob need to nag at him (i've nagged at him since he was in primary 1) but he is that teenager now. he no longer needs me to take care of him as much as before. in fact, he'd prob be doing it back to me.
I feel... proud... Proud that this boy and i have pulled through so much family CRAP yet come to where we are. normal and happy and succeeding (so far..)
I remember crying to him as a child, telling him about the 'truth' about our family background (coz everything happened whe he was a baby) telling him who is his real mom, who takes care of him, who he should respect (all) etc etc..
thinking back, i dunoe if i have done the right thing to tell him that. i remember his face looked realli traumatised. but at that moment i just knew it was time. he was getting older and i didn't want him to be confused.
anywayz.. i have alot of shopping to do. i wanna buy cool clothes and bags for my brother. He's going to be in secondary school now. and i want the best for him.
shit i feel like a mother. well. i've always been the mother the house... looking after my 2 younger sisters steph and pearlyn, yan zhong my brother, my grandma, the maid... especeically when my parents are working overseas. i was the MAN of the house. but now my sister has that job. and i'm she's doing well too.
he may be a big boy now, but he's always my little brother.
Sigh, i just spoke to my brother and i am so proud of him. he got a good 23+ score for PSLE. when i was in primary6, i only had 209. There was a certain difference to his voice. not only was it deeper, it was much more mature. i actually felt his disappointment (for his results. he expected higher) i felt the teenager in him. the grunting noises he made when he was answering my questions took my breath away.
he was no longer that small boy that tagged along every single game i played. from barbie dolls to catching. I no longer needed to hold his hand and watch out for steps and stuff and bad people for him when we went out. He no longer needs someone to pack his school bag for him (like i always do.) i will still prob need to nag at him (i've nagged at him since he was in primary 1) but he is that teenager now. he no longer needs me to take care of him as much as before. in fact, he'd prob be doing it back to me.
I feel... proud... Proud that this boy and i have pulled through so much family CRAP yet come to where we are. normal and happy and succeeding (so far..)
I remember crying to him as a child, telling him about the 'truth' about our family background (coz everything happened whe he was a baby) telling him who is his real mom, who takes care of him, who he should respect (all) etc etc..
thinking back, i dunoe if i have done the right thing to tell him that. i remember his face looked realli traumatised. but at that moment i just knew it was time. he was getting older and i didn't want him to be confused.
anywayz.. i have alot of shopping to do. i wanna buy cool clothes and bags for my brother. He's going to be in secondary school now. and i want the best for him.
shit i feel like a mother. well. i've always been the mother the house... looking after my 2 younger sisters steph and pearlyn, yan zhong my brother, my grandma, the maid... especeically when my parents are working overseas. i was the MAN of the house. but now my sister has that job. and i'm she's doing well too.
he may be a big boy now, but he's always my little brother.
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